Cool
by LovelessEgoist
Summary: A songfic, the song Cool by Gwen Stefani. I guess I just saw everything corelate so well...PS: I'm not Yun.


Cool

Cool

_It's hard to remember how it felt before_

_Now I found the love of my life_

Ritsuka sat still, and opened his mind - a box of thoughts. He looked around his room, letting his thoughts wander without really focusing on what's around him.

_Soubi turned around, with a slight smirk on his lips and took Ritsuka's chin, holding it up to face him. Ritsuka looked at him confusingly and a blush was starting to appear. Soubi brought his two fingers against his lips, kissing them, then pressed them unto Ritsuka's lips. Ritsuka froze, his blush obvious. Then Soubi smirked ever so slightly as if he was proud of his work then he turned again and walked away. Ritsuka stood in the backyard, his confusion and sudden rush of feelings rooting him to the spot._

Ritsuka took his head in his hands and bowed, silent.

_Passes things get more comfortable_

_Everything is going right_

"Is there anything I've done subconsciously that might have forced you to talk to me again?" Ritsuka definitely needed an answer. It was the key for him to understand what happened lately. "You didn't do it subconsciously." Was the response. Ritsuka admitted to himself that lately, he had felt like looking at Soubi from distances, just looking, but Soubi often caught him and he looked away quickly, too late.

"Please ignore me." Soubi said, breaking through his thoughts.

_And after all the obstacles_

_It's good to see you now with someone else_

_Soubi showed Ritsuka his phone, right to his face, where there were several "love" text messages. "Look! Did you read this one?" Soubi asked pointing to the screen. "Isn't that sweet!" Soubi smiled happily. Ritsuka returned his smile. "Yes, that's very nice."_

_And it'__s such a miracle that you and me are still good friends_

_After all that we've been through_,

"…_.you know, I, I-I love you." Ritsuka finally managed the words out, turning away, not meeting Soubi's eyes.__ He sat next to Soubi, but now, he wished they were miles apart._

_I know we're cool_

"_I'm sorry, but I just gave up on you, about, 2-3 weeks ago…you were once my everything, but, nothing happened to my feelings."_

_We used to think it was impossible_

_Now, you call me by my new last name_

_I am Loveless, he is Beloved. He is marked, he belongs to my brother. Why did I never see that? All I had to do was unwrap his bandages…_

Ritsuka tugged on his hair tightly, still bowed.

_Memories seem like so long ago_

_Time always kills the pain_

_He stared at Soubi's sleeping face. He looked so peaceful. As he laid beside his fighter, who slept on his stomach, Ritsuka simply stared, and he knew he would never get tired of it. He brought his fingers to slightly caress Soubi's cheeks, and to his relief, his fighter didn't even flinch. __After a while, Soubi's lids softly lifted to reveal his eyes._

_Such beautiful blue orbs, Ritsuka thought._

His grip on his hair grew tighter, as he bowed lower.

_Remember Harbour Boulevard_

_The dreaming days where the mess was made_

"_What did she tell you?" Ritsuka asked, sitting on top of his parents' bed. Soubi sat on the computer chair, a meter away. "It's got nothing to do with you. Don't worry about it."_

"_But, are you sure? Tell me, Soubi!" Ritsuka insisted, his face strained. " Of course Ritsuka knew, to be honest, he was the one who asked Yuko to call his fighter, through internet chat even, to get his fighter to give away anything about his feelings for Ritsuka, he knew it was a very impatient way, but he did it. He told Yuko to tell Soubi his feelings as if it were a secret that she wasn't supposed tell him, just to convince Soubi to say anything to Yuko, and then, he'll know. Ritsuka knew the outcome. Yuko told him that Soubi loved him but he never retaliated so Soubi was losing hope, and other things like that. Now, about a week later, he was going to get it out from Soubi himself. "What did you say to her?! She wouldn't tell me anything!" It was almost like a shout, since Ritsuka's voice was controlling his anger, telling a complete lie. "It doesn't have anything to do with you." Soubi said with a flat, emotionless tone. "Please, tell me!" Soubi stood up and walked quickly to the door, slamming it. He'll probably just fume on the lounge, he thought. But Ritsuka felt his tears fall. " Soubi!" He stood up as he heard another, rougher slam. "SOUBI!" He ran to the lounge, finding it empty to his shock. The main door was in the lounge. Soubi had gone. "SOUBI!" he struggled opening the door, and looked outside, looking around, but seeing the empty street. He cried, going back into the house, and back unto the bed. He shivered, and held his arms as he cried harder and harder. _

"_SOUBI!"_

_Look how all the kids have grown_

_We have changed, but we're still the same_

_Ritsuka looked around the chapel. He could almost see Soubi pacing around, calling to him. Smiling. Then lying down asleep on the pillows. Then almost as if he closed in on him, wearing that smirk, as if he were craving for another kiss._

He hugged himself, and was surprised he hadn't torn his hair out yet.

After all that we've been through

I know we're cool

_For him,__ I will not cry_. He barely stopped his tears. He told him not to cry anymore, that's all his new beloved said. Someone he now knows he loved. It wasn't that he loved Soubi still, partly he did, but it was just that the memories never failed to inflict pain.

_And I'll be happy for you_

_If you can be happy for me_

"_I'm saving this last patty cake that I baked. Sorry, this one's reserved." Ritsuka said, with an apologetic smile on his face. He already gave Soubi two, but his last, iced one, was for his dearest._

"_That's for that senpai, right? That older guy in year 12?" Soubi asked._

"_Well, yes. But I'm not sure if he'd still talk to me, I sorta got him mad at me.." Ritsuka admitted sheepishly._

_Circles and triangles,_

_And now we're hanging with your new girlfriend_

"_So are you still going to that anime convention, right? Who are you cosplaying as?"_

_Ritsuka asked, curious. Maybe, maybe if he didn't go with his group, then he could cosplay with him._

"_I'm not cosplaying at all. I'm going with Seimei, just the two of us, I won't be in the group."_

_Ritsuka's eyes widened for a second, then turned normal again. _

"_Oh okay."_

_So far from where we've been_

_I know we're cool_

Ritsuka rested his last thought, the last things that Soubi had ever told him, on their last conversation, on the phone.

"Please ignore me."


End file.
